Sam’s six-year-old daughter Rosie* had regular verbal and aggressive physical outbursts which resulted in an unhealthy family environment. The family were living life shrouded in darkness, until Coral Tree Family Service flicked the switch and provided the support of a million light globes.
“From day dot she failed to thrive which resulted in delayed growth in a number of areas,” Sam explained. “She had food protein-induced enterocolitis syndrome (FPIES) that affected her gastrointestinal tract, and this also impeded those normal bonding moments.”
When she was a few years old, Rosie was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). She found it difficult to regulate her emotions and connect with other children, including her two older sisters. This resulted in challenging behaviours and learning difficulties.
“Often the issues come to the surface at pre-school when they are in an environment with other children and their difficulties in a social and more structured environment grow,” said Cath McElroy, Service Manager at Coral Tree Family Service.
Sam was exhausted from endless conversations with teachers who thought Rosie was “too much” and having to frequently collect her from school due to her physical and verbal aggression. She withdrew into a bubble to defend and shelter Rosie from the constant damaging feedback she received from teachers, parents and other children.
“Rosie was always in her own world of negative thoughts. It was heartbreaking as other children didn’t want to play with her and she had a reputation as a “naughty child” which resulted in low self-esteem,” said Sam.
As a parent, at times Sam became impatient with Rosie and felt she wasn’t being a good mother in those moments. She desperately wanted to flip those feelings into a learning curve, but she had no support and no one to help her rearrange her thoughts.
Thankfully, the family’s therapist referred them to Coral Tree in 2021.
Sam enjoying a conversation with therapist Kristie
Located on the grounds of the Macquarie Hospital in North Ryde, Coral Tree is a statewide tertiary referral service that aims to assist the families of children showing mental health, behavioural, emotional, and relationship difficulties. It is the only service of its kind in Australia and there is no charge to families who use the service.
“We partner with parents and carers as the main decision-makers and agents for change when working to address the concerns and needs of children and families, leading to more meaningful and sustainable change,” explained Cath.
They offer a Family Residential Program where all members of the family who reside in the child’s household attend. The five-day program includes parent management training, cognitive behaviour therapy as well as family therapy.
“It was obvious straight away how disconnected we were as a family, and how my two older girls felt resentment and isolation due to our dysfunctional family situation,” said Sam.
As part of the therapy, the family were given the tools on how to control aggressive and intrusive behaviors and understand healthy boundaries.
In one-on-one therapy sessions, Rosie’s sisters were able to voice their issues and were given coping strategies.
Following the residential program, family members continued to take part in regular therapy meetings and group classes at Coral Tree through the Clinical School Program.
Importantly, Rosie learnt strategies on how she could self-manage her own behaviour such as when she’s feeling overwhelmed, it is OK to remove herself from the situation and calmly sit in a quiet space to work on her emotions.
Likewise, Sam developed a more positive parent-child relationship by managing Rosie’s behaviour with the time-out strategy which enabled them both to reset, before they could agree on a resolution and move forward.
For Sam, she was relieved her family were reconnecting following the encouraging support they received from the therapists at Coral Tree as they had “sat in discomfort” for so long.
In tandem with her mainstream school, Rosie attended Arndell School four days a week so she could continue to learn in a safe and engaging environment. Also located on the grounds of Macquarie Hospital, Arndell School caters for 20 primary school students. The Clinical School Program is a partnership between NSW Health (Coral Tree) and the Department of Education (Arndell) for students with emotional and behavioural support needs.
When Rosie was in Year Two, she was gradually reintroduced into her mainstream school full-time, through the support of this program.
“Before we came to Coral Tree, Rosie couldn’t read. It’s great to see she’s blossomed and how far she’s come – she can read, her writing has improved, and her school has recognised the positive changes in her behaviour,” Sam says proudly.
Due to her ASD, Rosie will continue to struggle socially, but Sam has noticed that Rosie is developing into a compassionate little girl.
Therapist Kristie McDonald says “It’s an incredible program and the commitment by Sam and her family to take advantage of every aspect has helped Rosie to thrive. We are incredibly proud of Sam who attended every therapy session offered and utilised it.”
Sam is extremely thankful for Coral Tree providing her and her family with the resources to ensure their life is less chaotic, which has also contributed to improved relationships for all family members.
If you would like to help make a difference to the lives of children and families in need of support at Coral Tree Family Service, please make a tax-deductible donation here.
*Name has been changed for privacy.
